How to live the uninhibited life?

Hi, if you are new to me and my writing, my name is Amar. I am 43 at the time of writing this, and have been lately thinking about the kind of life I want to live for the next 50 years. I know, some of you might say- don’t you want to retire?

No, I don’t want to retire and I am going to write another post explaining why. Anyhow, this post is about learning how to live uninhibited life. That’s what I want to do, for the rest of my life, whatever rest is. That’s what I want you to do as well, or at least, make an effort to do- to live the uninhibited life.

What does inhibited mean?

According to dictionary, inhibited means overly restrained. Simply put, to inhibit ourselves is to suppress our behavior because it is not what’s expected in the environment, we are in. We are scared that if we express ourselves, someone, our parents, our boss, our family may end up punishing us behaving in a way that’s not quite right, or mature, or whatever the standards of behavior are.

So, we inhibit or restrain ourselves. We don’t let ourselves be.

Look at these examples of how society or our families create inhibitions around us. Perhaps you would find some of this familiar.

The inhibited life: don’t go into the rain

It’s raining. You want to go into the rain, but someone tells you, “hey, don’t go in the rain, you will fall sick.” So, you don’t go in the rain.

The inhibited life: don’t go to the dance party

There is a dance party in the school. You really want to go, but your parents are conservative and they tell you that all these things are stupid, and for rich and spoilt people. So, you inhibit yourself, and do not go to the dance party.

The inhibited life: Your boss steals your idea at work

You are in office, and you have a brilliant idea about how to grow the revenue for the company. What do you do next? You take that idea to your boss and he shoots that down, saying it’s an absurd idea, and takes the credit for it instead in front of his boss. You inhibit yourself from sharing any more ideas, for they would be stolen anyways.

The inhibited life: They stop you from expressing yourself

In a meeting at work, you want to share an important experience which you think will benefit the whole team but the moment you open your mouth, your boss shuts you down, saying something demeaning like it’s a trifling matter and you shut up, and are scared to again open your mouth in the meeting, inhibiting yourself.

The inhibited life: They instill the fear of failure in you

You are in college, and you really like a girl. However, she happens to come from a rich family, while you don’t. Some of your well-meaning friends advise you not to approach her because she would reject you anyways. So, inhibit yourself and shoot down your luck, without even trying. She may have said yes, because you are quite a smart kid and your financial status is irrelevant in college.

You are in school and want to participate in a debate contest. However, one of your teachers tell you that you have no skill in speaking and debating, so you should not even bother trying and so you don’t, inhibiting yourself.

The inhibited life: They discourage you

You think as an adult that you would make it as a writer. But you see writers failing all over the world, with nobody reading their blogs, books and posts. The fear of failure freezes you and you stop writing altogether, inhibiting yourself.

The inhibited life: They don’t believe in you

You think you could make it as an entrepreneur but nobody in your entire family has ever run a business, and everybody has been in a job. So, when you share the idea with your family, they shoot in down, saying, “where would the money come from, while you build the product?” You don’t have an answer to that or the energy to convince them that working for yourself is a different game that working for someone else where they pay you a salary. But you can’t do it on your own. So, you don’t become an entrepreneur and continue to work in a job all your life, hating every moment of your life, inhibiting yourself.

The inhibited life: You stop yourself

You are 50 and have always been in a job. Recently, you discovered your passion for the stage and want to take a break to spend some time experimenting with the stage. But you have kids and a wife and expenses, and you don’t do anything and inhibit yourself.

The inhibited life: A story of how it looks for millions of us

You are 10, and want to participate in a poetry event where you can recite poetry to a live audience. However, your family wants you to become an engineer or a doctor, and not a stupid poet. So, you never participate, and inhibit yourself, while keeping a book of your poems, which somebody finds when you are 80, and dead.

The inhibited life: Family becomes the barrier

You are a 20-year-old woman who wants to go to work. However, your family decides that women in the family won’t work, and will only take care of the household, while men would work and take care of the finances. So, you never go to work, and become a housewife, while you look at women succeeding in business all their lives as you age, and wonder what your life could have been.

You are in college and want to be a sportsman. The college says that you could make an amazing cricketer but your family decides that too risky, and not everyone can be a cricketer. So, you do an MBA and become a spoke in the corporate wheel, never ever to be recognized for excellence again. You make do, but you never find happiness.

You loved to crack jokes in college, and make everyone laugh. Your friends thought you could become a stand-up comedian and you saw some dreams that you might just become one, and make people laugh around the world. But your family was a family or doctors, and so you had to become a doctor, and forget about being the stand-up comedian you could be, inhibiting yourself.

You discover your passion for dancing in your 40’s. You are an average bank employee with a wife and kids. When you try to make some videos dancing, your wife shoots the idea down, and says you look stupid dancing. So, you never post a video. You inhibit yourself.

Moving from the inhibited life to the uninhibited life

90% of us in the world are living what I would call the inhibited life. Inhibited, retrained because nobody believed is us, while we had the spark, while there was some life still left in us.

Someone told us that we are not good enough, or we can’t achieve something, or we will never make it or be successful and we stopped ourselves. Fuck that someone!

Listen to me, carefully. You are still alive.

You won’t get chance again, to be alive.

Get rid of your inhibitions and live a life that it true to yourselves.

How to live the uninhibited life?

Now that we have defined the problem statement, let us look at the solution. How to be uninhibited, lose your inhibitions and be the best we can be- how to live the uninhibited life:

1. The uninhibited life: Slowly start expressing yourself

If you feel that you lack the ability to express yourself, because you were restrained as a child or an adult, slowly start breaking free from that awful pattern. You will need to find people who would allow you to be yourself. If you won’t find anyone, write a speech, and recite in front of the mirror. See how you speak. Practice, till you get better.

Express yourself in every possible situation, in whatever way you find suitable. If you think, your job sucks and they don’t allow you to express yourself, find a better job, where they appreciate your ability to express yourself. Given you can’t find a better job, start making some time on the weekends to participate in events or places where you can express yourself.

If you are a student, participate in speech or debate competitions beyond academics. Your ability to express yourself will help you in every job, every business you may get into.

There is a world out there, and if you look for a support group, you will find one.

If we want to lead the uninhibited life, we need to learn to express ourselves freely.

2. The uninhibited life- don’t let anyone tell you that you can’t do something

No, you will not let others decide you are capable of. Promise me that you won’t.

There are billions of people around the world leading meaningless, mediocre lives. You do not want to one of them.

People who live mediocre lives, want others to live mediocre lives, because there is comfort in familiarity.

What you will instead you, is believe in yourself, and work really hard, persist, and stay driven through the journey.

3. Dance spontaneously no matter how old you are

I have begun to love dancing, in the last 2—3 years. I feel dance is a great metaphor for life, and when we dance, and how we dance, reflects on our attitude towards life. When I dance, I dance so freely that I don’t care if the whole world is watching me or nobody is.

Dance like you don’t care if anyone is watching, because you are fucking alive in that moment.

If you want to live the uninhibited life, and I am guessing you do, since you have so far in this article, I highly recommend that you dance a few times a week. When you dance, loosen your hair, let them flow where they like, let your body move to the music, and don’t you fucking miss a beat.

4. You will find who you love and what you love

Steve Jobs was right about almost everything. Till you find what you love, keep looking and don’t settle.

Do not settle for the meaningless. I will leave this point here.

5. The uninhibited life: You will find a way out to live a life that is completely true to yourself

Hey, I don’t know how you will do that. What I am trying to do here, is to plant a seed for you to live the uninhibited life. I am writing here on the internet, hoping people will find this article, and it will inspire them to live a life true to who they are, uninhibited and free.

You may need to leave your job or ask some time to take a break.

Perhaps, if your relationships are too stifling, you need to find better relationships.

May be, you need to borrow some money from someone to work on a passion project which could change your life, for ever.

I don’t know what it is, for you. What I know is that you have a desire to be more, and live a freer life, an uninhibited life, away from the shackles of other people’s desires and beliefs of you. You want to live that life, and here I am pushing you to find that path.

In Conclusion- the uninhibited life

The question I want to ask you and perhaps to myself as well, is this:

Will you live a life completely true to yourself, to your beliefs, to your passions, as a free, spirited human being or you will live a life inhibited by other people’s beliefs, opinions and rules? Will you live the inhibited, or will you live the uninhibited life?

Why do I write this blog?

The purpose of this blog is to help you find your happiness. Please read the other posts on the blog, and follow so that you get updates when new posts are published. Please share the post with your friends so that they can also find their happiness. If you have any feedback for me, please leave it in the comments and I would be happy to work on it. If you would like to support my writing and this blog, you may please send a donation through PayPal here.

I appreciate the time you spent in reading the blog and wish you happiness.

Love,

Amarvani

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